How to Be a Super-Connector with Hilary Gadsby
- Aug 9, 2024
- 15 min read
Updated: Jun 19
TL;DR
I struggle with traditional networking and feel like it never leads to business opportunities. How can I build a powerful network that actually helps scale my business?
To build a high-impact network, you must shift from transactional networking to a relationship framework focused on mutual value creation. Embracing the strategic approaches championed by Hilary Gadsby allows you to treat every connection as an ecosystem asset rather than a one-off transaction. By leading with curiosity and actively connecting complementary peers, you establish your position as a trusted advisor at the center of your industry.
Unlock the Power of Connection: Becoming a Master Connector in Business
In the modern business landscape, many entrepreneurs obsess over digital funnels, ad spend, and automated outreach. While these operational systems are necessary for scaling, they often cause founders to overlook the most valuable, organic asset at their disposal: social capital. High-value business growth is rarely built in a vacuum. It is accelerated by the depth and quality of your strategic relationships.
True networking is not about collecting business cards or spamming LinkedIn connections with pitch decks. Instead, sustainable growth belongs to the master connectors—those who understand how to cultivate long-term ecosystems. By examining the networking strategies utilized by industry leaders like Hilary Gadsby, entrepreneurs can learn how to transform casual introductions into life-changing business opportunities.
The Art of Leveraging Strategic Relationships According to Hilary Gadsby
Every major breakthrough in business usually traces back to a specific relationship. Whether it is a chance encounter that introduces you to an ideal corporate client, or an introduction to a mentor who helps you restructure your pricing model, relationships are the ultimate growth catalysts.
To capitalize on this potential, you must expand your networking scope. It is a mistake to only build relationships with individuals who can immediately buy your services or fund your projects. Instead, prioritize genuine engagement with a diverse array of professionals across complementary industries.
The secret to this approach is leading with an asset-first mindset. Before you ever ask a new connection for a referral, a testimonial, or a partnership, evaluate how you can support their current initiatives. Asking how you can add value establishes immediate trust and sets the foundation for a mutually beneficial alliance.
Connecting the Dots in Your Business Ecosystem
A master connector possesses a unique skill: the ability to look at a fragmented network and see a cohesive picture. This involves mentally mapping out your network, identifying the distinct needs of various peers, and recognizing how an introduction between two separate contacts could solve a problem for both.
Developing this connective intuition requires two specific operational habits:
Deconstruct Your Own Business Objectives: You cannot effectively navigate a network if you are unclear about your own current roadmap. Define your exact operational needs, whether you are looking for a reliable software developer, a fractional CFO, or a joint venture partner.
Practice Active Listening During Discovery: When meeting peers, move past surface-level small talk. Ask intentional questions about their current operational bottlenecks, upcoming launches, and long-term scaling goals.
When you maintain an accurate mental map of what the people around you need, you can begin making high-value introductions. By acting as the bridge that connects resources to problems, you organically elevate your own authority and influence within your industry.
Building an Ecosystem of Long-Term Support
Isolation is an operational risk for any business founder. Surrounding yourself with an ecosystem of mentors, colleagues, and strategic partners provides the psychological resilience and institutional knowledge required to navigate market volatility.
This is why proximity to high-level rooms is a critical investment for growth. High-proximity environments—such as curated industry masterminds, roundtable discussions, and premier regional events—are designed specifically to shorten the distance between your business and the resources it needs. Engaging in these spaces gives you direct access to the real, unfiltered stories of successful founders who have already solved the compliance, scaling, and team-building hurdles you are currently facing.
Furthermore, active participation in these professional spaces creates an environment where collaborative opportunities thrive. When you show up consistently and authentically, you naturally discover peer networks that provide both tactical advice and strategic accountability.
Conclusion: Activating Your Network Value
Transitioning from a passive networker to a master connector is a deliberate operational shift. By focusing on authentic relationship design, connecting complementary peers, and embedding yourself in high-value communities, you unlock a sustainable pipeline of opportunities for your company.
Long-term business success is heavily accelerated by the strength of your ecosystem. Adopt a giving mindset, protect your professional relationships, and treat your social capital as a primary engine for business growth.
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Transcript for Episode 343. Mastering the Art of Connection
Amy [00:00:03]:
What the heck is a master connector? My friend, this can be one of the secrets to moving your business forward faster and in a way that feels aligned. Today's guest, Hilary Gadsby, is founder and CEO of Bosstalks. She is a master connector who helps women create opportunities for themselves and for others. Hillary, thank you so much for joining me here today. Let's dive in and talk about this subject. First of all, what the heck is a master connector? What do you mean when you say that term?
Hilary Gadsby [00:00:43]:
So it's really interesting, and I didn't come up with this term, I've heard it many, many times before. But I have this innate ability to see opportunity where others don't. And I love to hear the problems that people are having, especially women in their business, and finding out who can I connect them with in my circle to help them get to that next level. And so a master connector is somebody who can really see those opportunities for other people in utilizing their own social capital or someone else's. And so that is what a master connector does. And I've been doing this since I was about 15 years old.
Amy [00:01:30]:
Oh, my gosh.
Hilary Gadsby [00:01:31]:
My mother and father were great at it. And it's just something that is just, it's natural in me. I love to connect people, and it really, truly lights me up.
Amy [00:01:42]:
Yeah. It's so important in business. I consider myself also to be a master connector. And I think it's the coolest feeling ever when you can bring two people that are looking for each other yet have no clue that they need each other, introduce them and watch what unfolds. Like, to me, that is the biggest warm, fuzzy feeling in the world. How about you? Do you, like, just get that high from it? Like, oh, my gosh, they're doing this because of me.
Hillary [00:02:10]:
Yes, I love that. I mean, I have been able to bring new business and new friendships to a lot of different people in my life that have come into my sphere. And, yes, when somebody gets a new job because of somebody that I introduce them to or if they get a new client or a new vendor that they need, like a social media manager or a web designer or somebody like that, I love doing that because, especially when it becomes, you know, when it becomes something big for that other person, I love doing that.
Amy [00:02:43]:
Yeah, absolutely. Now, you mentioned you've been doing this like, you've watched your parents connect people growing up. You've always seemed to have this innate ability to connect others. How have you really leveraged connecting others to help yourself grow your business? Because, you know, we love helping connect others. But why does this then help us grow our businesses?
Hillary [00:03:06]:
Sure. So it goes back to when I was about 15 years old. My mother actually taught me. I guess you could say she was trying to teach me. I didn't know it at the time, but she was trying to teach me how to leverage relationships. But I was about 15 years old, and I'm originally from Sun Valley, Idaho. And there's this one boutique in Sun Valley that sells Ralph Lauren, and it's called the brass ranch. And I was sitting there, like, folding this Ralph Lauren sweater, and my mom was coming in for lunch, and I was waiting for her, and she walks in with a gentleman, and I just.
Hillary [00:03:46]:
I had no idea who this guy was. I kind of had an idea. I'd seen him around town, but I didn't know who he was. Well, that person was Steve Wynn, the casino mogul.
Amy [00:03:57]:
Oh, my gosh, yes.
Hillary [00:04:00]:
So my mom knew him pretty well from just people in our hometown, because it's a very small place. And she walked in, and as I was folding the sweater, he introduces himself and I, and we get in this conversation about Ralph Lauren and how much we both love Ralph Lauren. And he said, well, you know, Ralph Lauren is a really close personal friend of mine, so, you know, if you ever wanted to meet him or maybe work for him, just let me know. Here's my cell phone number, you know, and, you know, I'm 46 now, so that was a really long time ago. But what I didn't realize, what my mother was trying to do was how you're leveraging a connection. She's bringing someone to me, and then he's giving me an opportunity that I didn't automatically know at the time because I used to watch fashion shows with my mom on Saturdays, and this is really going to date me with this woman named Elsa Clench on CNN. And she would do these fashion shows of France, of the Paris and Milan and London fashion shows, and it was so amazing. And New York fashion shows.
Hillary [00:05:08]:
And so I grew up with these fashion shows, and I was like, I want to be in the fashion industry. So I thought that that was the coolest thing. I was like, I get to meet Ralph Lauren. That could be so cool, right? But little did I know what it was going to do for me. Fast forward to when I was 19, living in Paris, sitting in my dorm room saying, what am I going to do? I need an internship, and I'm going in, and I want to be in the fashion industry. Well, a light bulb went off in my head, and I was like, okay, Steve Wynn. I remember what he said. And I ended up giving him a call.
Hillary [00:05:44]:
And he remembered me, funny enough, and he said, do you have a resume? Said, no. He said, put one together. So I did, and I sent it to him. And within about a week, I got a call from David Lauren, who happens to be Ralph Lauren's son. And he said, you know, I have your resume. I have sent it over to human resources at Ralph Lauren in Paris. Here, you know, I'm going to put you in touch, and they're going to set up an interview with you. And that was just the foot in the door, right? You've got to do the rest for yourself.
Hillary [00:06:19]:
And so after that, I went into the interview, I killed it, and I got the internship. And what I realized was, okay, this was something that I can. That this. This is a connection that I leveraged, and I got what I want. What can I. What more can I do? And so it's about, you asked about how do you do it? It's about connecting the dots. How do you connect the dots? And my mind works a little bit like a whiteboard. So you know how we get up a whiteboard and we start to brainstorm and we start to connect the dots? That's how my brain works.
Hillary [00:06:53]:
And I love to teach women, especially, how to do it. And it's like, how do you look at all your connections that you have, all the people that you know, and the first thing you need to do is you need to find out what they need, and then they can help you along the way as well. That's how I do it.
Amy [00:07:12]:
Yeah, that's really a critical part of it, is asking others, what do you need? But then really having that clarity for yourself, because the law of reciprocity, you know, obviously they're going to ask us back, well, what can I do for you in return? And so often I hear fellow entrepreneurs say, I don't know. I don't know what I need. Do you run into that as well?
Hillary [00:07:39]:
I do. Yes, I absolutely do. And I think it's just conditioning them to learn how to network and how to talk to people. Because when you start talking to people and you start learning about them and you start learning about what their offerings are, you say, oh, okay, maybe that's what I need. And then you start. Then that conversation happens. Right? And then you start thinking, okay, well, who else do I know that might be able to help me get what I need? And that's how it works.
Amy [00:08:12]:
Yeah. So how are you tracking this information because your network has grown so big and everybody's got their own way of doing it. Some people just, you remember everyone that they come in contact for. Other people use the spreadsheets. Like, what's working for you in your business right now?
Hillary [00:08:29]:
I'm lucky that I actually have a, I have a photographic memory, but I try to build relationships where I can. The people that I really want to build a relationship with, that's what I do. And so there's a gentleman who was somewhat of a mentor for me a long time ago. He said he since passed, but he used to do this networking group here in LA. His name was Carl Tarzian. And Carl talked about the front and the backside of your business card. The front side was obviously what you do. The backside is who you are.
Hillary [00:09:03]:
And so it's important to know who the person is because we all love doing business with people that we actually like. Right. We don't want to do business with people that we don't like. And so it's about building those relationships and learning about who that person is, not just about what they do.
Amy [00:09:21]:
Yeah. And I think something else you said, too, like, it's not necessarily something they may need right now. It's, you know, there may be someone I run into at a networking event, at a conference that is the perfect fit. I may not have them here right now, but just like your story that you said you had this phone number from Steve Wooden, like, to connect you to Ralph Lauren's people and like, okay, how are we going to do this? And you didn't necessarily need it right then, but when you did need it, you had the bravery to be like, you know what? I'm going to go for this. I'm actually going to be like, okay, well, he wouldn't have given it to me if he didn't really want me to use it. And I think a lot of us get in our minds and create all of this mind drama. So for the entrepreneur that's listening, that's thinking, okay, that's great, but do people really want to help me? What do you say to her?
Hillary [00:10:17]:
They do. They do want to help you. And you know what the worst thing that they could say is? No, I don't have time. Right. It's, it's about having that confidence and having the mindset, like, just go for it because we're going to fail along the way. It's about failing forward. Right. It's about, it's about those learning things.
Hillary [00:10:35]:
And if somebody says no, the next person's going to say yes. You've got to get yourself in a position where you're willing to ask. The ask is the most important part of it.
Amy [00:10:48]:
Yeah. And I think that's hard. It's just a skill that takes practice because we're so afraid of hearing no, but whatever. Like, it's not a big deal. You hear the word no all the time. Like we've been conditioned to be afraid of it, but in reality, like, okay, but what if it all works out when we can start to make these little mindset shifts? It's huge.
Hillary [00:11:10]:
Correct. Though I always say that there's always a yes at the end of every no. There's going to be a yes eventually, right. It's just how many times you have to do it to get there. And it's just. Just knowing that, okay, I might fail the first time, but the second time I'm going to learn from that and I'm going to do it a little differently.
Amy [00:11:33]:
Yeah, yeah. It gives us so much valuable data. We can learn from these notes. Learn. Okay, maybe I could have worded that differently. Maybe my ask wasn't clear enough. Maybe, you know, get curious and dive in and ask yourself, well, what could I tweak? You know, it's not necessarily burn the whole business down. It's, let's refine this a little bit and test it again and again and again until we get those yeses.
Amy [00:11:59]:
And something you are doing as a master connector is you are curating these amazing summits. You did one in Florida, you have one coming up in Connecticut. They're called the building a boss summits. Tell us all about those and, like, who should be in this room and what they'll get out of it.
Hillary [00:12:19]:
So with boss talks, what we do is we are, our cornerstone is about mentorship and connections and really feel that it's so important for women to have mentors from women and listen to and hear the stories and get the keys to success from women who have 1020 plus years ahead of you because they're going to tell you what not to do and what to do. And so, and then the connection piece is obviously, how do you build those relationships with each other? And so with boss talks, we do that on a daily basis. But what I wanted to do with this summit was condense it all in one full day. It's kind of an accelerator of 10 hours of incredible women speakers who are going to tell you exactly the good, the bad and the ugly of what it means to be an entrepreneur and give you the keys and the blueprint that you need to be successful, to be as successful as they are. And so we started it in Florida. It was an amazing success. We did it on March 2 in Florida, and everybody had an amazing time. The energy is incredible.
Hillary [00:13:35]:
The takeaways were incredible as well. And the connections that were had were amazing. There was one girl that came to me and said, first of all, this was Tony Robbins level. Second of all, she said, I have been in Tampa for not very long time. I moved here because of a man, and now, and I didn't. And the only network I had was his. Now I don't. Now I have my own network and I'm planning to stay.
Hillary [00:14:02]:
That to me was like, wow, another girl, this other girl who has my namesake, Hillary, she said the same thing. She said, I had no idea what I was getting into going to your event. And she's like, I'm so glad I did because now I'm like ten steps ahead of where I wanted to be when I first walked in that door. And so those things light me up. And so, again, the reason why we're doing Hartford is because one of the speakers came up to me and said, I want this in my hometown. And so building a boss summit is happening in Hartford, Connecticut on October 5. And you've got to be in the room. These women really, truly know what they're doing.
Hillary [00:14:42]:
The curated speakers. We have over 15 speakers in the room, and there are three keynote speakers, one of which is Jessica Zweig, who has simply be agency. She just sold it to Hawk Media. She has a brand new book coming out called the Light Work. And she's really going to be talking about how you sell your business, but then also how you pivot and create something new. And I love Jessica so much. She's going to be amazing. And we also have Vanessa Copas, who's the founder of Bella magazine and Bella Media.
Hillary [00:15:16]:
We have Danielle Margraf, who's a leader in feminine wealth. And she's going to be teaching where there are workshops, there are panels, so there's inspiration, there's interactive, you know, interactive panels. It's going to be really an amazing day, and they're really going to truly give you the blueprint of what it means to be a successful entrepreneur, especially as a woman. And with Hartford, what I like so much, you know, why Hartford, Connecticut? Not only is Julie living there, but also one of the things she told me is they are really, truly highlighting women entrepreneurs this year and beyond. And that's what we want, where there's movement for women entrepreneurs. That's where boss talks, wants to be.
Amy [00:16:00]:
Yes. Oh, that sounds absolutely incredible. I mean, being an entrepreneur, it can be a challenge. You know, it's very easy to feel alone in the online space, to feel lost, to think everyone else has it together. But what I love that you said is, you know what? These speakers are curated to share the good, the bad, and the ugly. And you have some powerhouses lined up to be in the room. So make sure you check out buildingabosssummit.com for all the details. Get into the room and really get clear on what it is that you need.
Amy [00:16:39]:
And then you too can start being that super connector for others in your world. Ask those that are already in your world. What do you need? How can I support you? That's what it starts with. It all starts with the bravery to ask. Reach out. Check on those around you. Get into the room at the building of boss summit coming up in Hartford, Connecticut. Hillary, thank you so much for being here today.
Hillary [00:17:09]:
You. Thank you so much, Amy, it was such a pleasure meeting you and talking all about being a master connector.
Amy [00:17:16]:
Love it. And until next time, cheers to making the money you want so that you can create the impact you desire.
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